02.10.08
Posted in Fun, Memes, Reflective at 1:57 pm by Mister JTA
Haircut:
Well, first up I’ve just had a haircut. Was surprisingly quick, and fairly painless. I don’t get on with haircuts, as a rule. Unless I know the barber I never have anything to say, and I just sit there gawping at my own reflection and wondering if I’m moving my head too much.
The barber in Hadley was a decent guy, once I got to know him, and Gino in Newport is the only chap I’ve met who knows what I mean when I say “Er, well, a general trim, I guess. Sort of a short-back-and-sides, but short on top as well, and I don’t want a fringe*”.
Also, of course, the hanging about while the queue depletes before your very eyes can be pretty lame, especially if you’ve not got a book. This haircut only took twenty minutes, though, thus getting me to the “really uncomfy feeling of hairs stuck down the back of my collar” even faster than I expected. Whee.
My face has mysteriously become oval**, and my eyes seem to have got bigger. Like I say, I don’t get hair.
On the plus side, I shouldn’t need it cutting again before the Spring, which means it should be able to grow to a nice warmish sort of length before the frosts come, thus providing me with further insulation. Win.
Supreme Court meme:
Sarah Palin has famously (in America, that is, over here we didn’t notice; I got this from zoethe) been asked to list some Supreme Court rulings, and came up with a grand total of One (Roe V. Wade, natch) before descending into silence. This pleases me, because that means I know more about American law than a prospective Vice President of the United States of America***. I can name two Supreme Court rulings, only one of which is Roe V. Wade.
Anyway, there’s now a meme. It goes like this:
Post info about ONE Supreme Court decision, modern or historical to your blog. Any decision, as long as it’s not Roe v. Wade.
…then there’s some stuff about spreading the fun, but you all know I’m just showing off my dubiously-aquired knowledge.
Anyway, I pick the Only Other Supreme Court Ruling I’ve ever heard of (not bad going, really; I didn’t even hear about the Supreme Court until I was 19 or so).
I pick Hustler Magazine, Inc. V. Falwell.
Background to the ruling is as follows:
- Jerry Falwell is one of those famous TV Fundies.
- Campari is an alcoholic beverage, which in the 1980s ran an ad campaign where famous people “talked about their first time” (drinking Campari. See what they did there?)
- Hustler Magazine is a porno mag, the kind men read “strictly for the photos of the naked women.”
…y’can all see where this is going already, right?
Back in the early 1980s Hustler printed a mock Campari Ad wherein Falwell “talked about his first time.” The clever twist was that it was his first time having sex. With his mother, while they were both drunk on Campari. In an outhouse.****
Falwell wasn’t too pleased about this, and sued for libel, and hurt feelings, and what have you. Very long story short: it went to the Supreme Court in 1988. The Supreme Court had a think and then, by 8 votes to 0, came up with the following ruling:
The creators of parodies of public figures are protected against civil liability by the First Amendment, unless the parody includes false statements of fact made in knowing or reckless disregard of the truth.
Since the Ad in Hustler was listed in that edition’s contents as “Fiction; Ad and Personality Parody,” and since the fake Campari ad said it was a parody, and they didn’t actually think Falwell lost it to his mother whilst drunk on Campari [I'm paraphrasing], the ad wasn’t made in knowing or reckless disregard of the truth, but more in a spirit of fun.
Basically, “It’s OK to say such things about famous people, just as long as you don’t try and pass them off as being actually true.”
Given that Sarah Palin is a prospective Vice President of the United States of America, I’m growing really fond of that ruling… I mean, dinosaurs. Ffs.
Well lunch is nearly over, and I’ve got hairs all down the back of my neck. Guess I’ll leave the post about the N95, and the Answers to the bits of the meme nobody got yet for another time, huh?
Enjoy…
Footnotes:
*I’ve never worked out what a fringe is for. It spends three months growing into my eyes, gets chopped off, and then starts all over again. Why?
** Still, pudgy, but oval. Less moon-like, anyway, which is a start.
***For a given, and mainly wrong, value of “know,” anyway.
**** I honestly don’t know which bit of that paragraph I find more disturbing.
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27.09.08
Posted in Memes at 11:53 pm by Mister JTA
But, y’know. I figure this will interest / infuriate at least, er, three of you. So there we go.
It’s one of those memes that has Rules, which I’ll chuck up for your benefit at the start, so you can work out what you’re doing, even if that turns out to be “thumping PgDn good and hard.”
1. Put your music player on random. (having first loaded all your MP3s into it, I assume)
2. Post the first line from the first 20 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing the song. (Unless it’s spoken word, or entirely instrumental, or has a first line which consists entirely of the title of the song, in which case I’ve skipped it, as it’d be unfair on yez.)
3. Let everyone guess what song and artist (or musical) the lines come from. (Comments enabled. Knock yourselves out.)
4. Embolden the songs when someone guesses correctly. (Uhm. Kay.)
Looking them up on Google or any other search engine is CHEATING! (In capitals, an’ everything. Must be serious…)
I’d just like to point out that 20 doesn’t seem like very many. I mean that’s, what, 1 song opening per 3 Gb of MP3s? [62Gb/20=3.1; please correct me if that doesn't make sense.]
Still, let’s see what kind of a mood the RNG’s in, shall we? (& nuts to Popular Culture.)
- I heard Woodrow Wilson’s guns / I heard Maria cryin’
- A cadillac stood by the house, and the Yanks they were within
- What was that bang? It was the next big thing / exploding over our heads
- They passed me by / all of those great romances
–One of us / ABBA
- I’m dancing on the White House lawn / sipping tea by the Taj Mahal at dawn
–Life is a minestrone / 10cc
- My mind keeps on telling me that this is no good / and my heart is aching, and tells me I should
- [large quantities of saying "Woah"] You’re going round the circle / through another phase
- Dusk, is dawn, is day / where did it go?
- She had a bad childhood while she was young / so don’t judge her too badly.
- Turn away / if you could get me a drink of water / ’cause my lips are chapped and faded
–Cancer : My chemical romance My chemical romance
- Everything has a beginning / everything comes to an end / Take it or leave it, you’d better believe it / be my lover, be my friend
–Hero (Sweden ; Eurovision, 2008) / Charlotte Perrelli
- O is this the way they say the future’s meant to feel? / Ah, just twenty thousand people standing in a field?
–Sorted out for E’s and whizz / Pulp.
- Michael wears his tan like a flasher wears his coat / he’s full of mad adventures, he’s full of anecdotes
–Dangerous / Fairport Convention
- Isaac, nice chap / died of cancer / I gigged with him / many times
–Death song / PBH
- I tried to come down from you / tried with your voice in my head, knocking me back, every inch I moved
–Curve of the Earth / Matt Nathanson
- I still hear your voice when you sleep next to me / I still feel your touch in my dreams
–Every time we touch / Cascada
- Papers in the morning / bowler hat on head
–Cardiac arrest / Madness.
- A malady / has taken him over
–London lives / Blur
- It was eyes down at the bingo / on that lucky Friday night
–Tux on / Marillion
- Ron and Nancy got the house, but Sid and Nancy rule / I died eight years ago, I’m still a legend at my high school
–Alleluia / Dar Williams
… Hm. I’ve erred on the side of verbosity there, because I think the RNG is in an Obscure mood. Well, I say obscure. What I mean is “Things I don’t expect you people to know.”
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10.08.08
Posted in Memes at 12:10 am by Mister JTA
Astonishingly, I did actually find myself having to think for this one. So I’m unecessarily pleased with my result.
Your result for How good of a Calvinball player are you?…
Your Grade= A++ Amazing Calvinball knowledge and strategy!
91% Game_Knowledge and 89% Game_Skill!
Amazing. You are part of the 2.1% of the population that landed in this category.* You are an expert at the game and its history, and you did incredibly well when it came to playing Calvinball strategically.
This suggests that you definitely have a natural talent in Calvinball. You have learned that the trick to doing well in Calvinball is not brute strength, but quick wit. If you wanted to, you could conceivably turn professional right now.
You are definitely already talented enough to beat Calvin. A match versus the quick-witted tiger would be closer. Still, your infinite knowledge of the game and your brilliant strategy would surely propel you to victory.
* This is a made up number.
Take How good of a Calvinball player are you? at HelloQuizzy
In other news, today I have not been very productive. I bought a new ironing board cover from Woolies, which is good, because the old one is tatty, and then proceded to put off everything else I need to do until tomorrow, in favour of commencing a playthorugh of Spellcasting 101: Sorcerers Get All The Girls (Spoilers!).
I’d forgotten how much of a pain the Island of Lost Soles can be. And still I love the thing.
Bedtime now, though. Some of us are having one Hell of a time adjusting to actually getting some work done.
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09.08.08
Posted in Memes at 1:53 pm by Mister JTA
Your result for The RPG Class Test…
Mystic Theurge
Brilliant and spiritual! You are a Mystic Theurge!
Score! You have a prestige class. A prestige class can only be taken after you’ve fulfilled certain requirements. This may mean that you’re an exceptionally talented person, but it probably doesn’t.
The Mystic Theurge is a combination of a cleric and a mage. They can cast both arcane and divine spells, and are good at both, making them pretty terrifying on the battlefield. They have more raw spellpower than just about any other class.
You’re both intelligent and faithful, but not violent or deceitful. I guess that makes you a pretty good person.
Take The RPG Class Test at HelloQuizzy
What? I wanted something to do quickly, while the kettle boiled.
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28.07.08
Posted in General, Memes, Tech at 2:13 am by Mister JTA
A proper post with details on the last couple of weeks tomorrow, assuming I can find the time. Everything seems to have gone a bit hectic, lately, but I reckon after crashing out this evening I’ll be able to get something like a proper post done (in between running about and getting the airbed back of Dan and Claire so I can chuck it + pump at my sister when she turns up on Tuesday).
I think everything that I wanted to get working should be working, by now; looks like I’ve got Wordpress v. 2.6 up and running, at long last (It all broke horribly, and I couldn’t work out what on earth I was meant to be doing with it, until I looked at my watch, cursed the fact it was midnight, and cracked open a Mountain Dew to keep me going, whereupon my brain took a massive hit of caffine and realised that I should probably try commenting out the random security key they made me splice into the wp-config thingy. I am ashamed to have spent three hours trying to fix the sudden breakage of everything, and yet never once thought to try undoing the last change I made. Pitiful. Evidently you should all fill me up with caffinated drinks on a regular basis to stop me from becoming The Stupid.)
It also looks like I’m successfully exporting new entries on this blog to my old livejournal (which being the case will make that link go interesting, over there). I am Pleased about this, because if you go down a few entries on that site you’ll find the entry prior to today was made on the 11th of September 2005, and says “No I haven’t fixed the RSS feed [to make blog posts automatically appear here] yet. At some point, I’ll get someone good with computers to do it.”
Turns out that person was me. Whadda y’ know?
O, cool. this version of wordpress appears to come with a built-in word counter and an autosave. That actually almost makes up for the Many Hours I have spent looking at FAQs and then getting dispirited and going away and messing about with silly quizes, and things.
For some reason, the upgrade has eaten all of my old categories (specifically, it deleted all the names, which made them impossible to edit without manually changing the edit URL) so I’ve had to patch them together with guesswork. The ‘memes’ tag took a direct hit in the process, when I tried to convert things to tags, and then deleted both the tags and the category, so I’m afraid the memes will have to start again.
On the plus side, they can start again right now! Woo, and yay, and (quite possibly) horrible breaking of everything. I don’t know if I’ve done these before, because all memes feel the same and, of course, I no longer have a speedy indexing system, which prevents me from checking without effort. Still, let’s see if these things confuse the cross-poster, shall we?
Meme the first:
The Gentleman
Deliberate Gentle Love Master (DGLM)
Steady & mature. You are The Gentleman.
For anyone looking for an even-keeled, considerate lover, you’re their man. You’re sophisticated. You know what you want both in a relationship and outside of it. You have a substantial romantic side, and you’re experienced enough sexually to handle yourself in that arena, too. Your future relationships will be long-lasting; you’re classic “marrying material,” a prize in the eyes of many.
It’s possible that behind it all, you’re a bit of a male slut. Your best friends know that in relationships you’re fundamentally sex-driven. You’re a safe, reliable guy, who does get laid. In a lot of ways, you’re like a well-worn, comfortable pair of socks. Did you ever jack off into one of those? All the time.
Your ideal mate is NOT a nut-job. She is giving and loving, like you, but also experienced.
Your exact male opposite:
The Last Man on Earth
Random Brutal Sex Dreamer
Always avoid: The Battleaxe (DBLM)
Consider: The Maid of Honor (DGLM), someone just like you.
|
| Link: The Online Dating Persona Test
– Who on Earth drew that picture? Because I’d like to know where idea for combining Grecian armour with a Norman shield and a bastard sword came from. And why the chap seems to think it a higher priority to keep the balloon safe while the drugged-up child has got a kneecap full of arrows.
On the other hand, the actual text is absurdly flattering, except for the bit about the socks, so I oughtn’t complain too much.
Meme the Second:
Wherein I copy-paste some genuinely nasty-looking HTML
Your result for The Quick & Painless ENNEAGRAM Test…
8 - the Asserter
you chose AY - your Enneagram type is EIGHT (aka “The Challenger”).
“I must be strong”
Asserters are direct, self-reliant, self-confident, and protective.
How to Get Along with Me
- Stand up for yourself… and me.
- Be confident, strong, and direct.
- Don’t gossip about me or betray my trust.
- Be vulnerable and share your feelings. See and acknowledge my tender,
vulnerable side.
- Give me space to be alone.
- Acknowledge the contributions I make, but don’t flatter me.
- I often speak in an assertive way. Don’t automatically assume it’s
a personal attack.
- When I scream, curse, and stomp around, try to remember that’s just
the way I am.
What I Like About Being a EIGHT
- being independent and self-reliant
- being able to take charge and meet challenges head on
- being courageous, straightforward, and honest
- getting all the enjoyment I can out of life
- supporting, empowering, and protecting those close to me
- upholding just causes
What’s Hard About Being a EIGHT
- overwhelming people with my bluntness; scaring them away when I don’t intend to
- being restless and impatient with others’ incompetence
- sticking my neck out for people and receiving no appreciation for it
- never forgetting injuries or injustices
- putting too much pressure on myself
- getting high blood pressure when people don’t obey the rules or when
things don’t go right
EIGHTs as Children Often
- are independent; have an inner strength and a fighting spirit
- are sometimes loners
- seize control so they won’t be controlled
- fugure out others’ weaknesses
- attack verbally or physically when provoked
- take charge in the family because they perceive themselves as the strongest, or grow up in difficult or abusive surroundings
EIGHTs as Parents
- are often loyal, caring, involved, and devoted
- are sometimes overprotective
- can be demanding, controlling, and rigid
Renee Baron & Elizabeth Wagele
The Enneagram Made Easy
Discover the 9 Types of People
Harper
SanFrancisco, 1994, 161 pages
Which is a damn fine way of saying “You’re a right bolshy sod, you are,” and which, for something that only asked me two questions, and therefore allowed me to get back to attempting to put entire new users into the mySQL thing that I don’t even begin to understand, and which, of course, was of no material use anyway, is pretty cool.
But then I’m a gullible twonk when it comes to that sort of thing. Can’t help but go pushing radio buttons, that’s my problem. Hell, if someone produced a 35-question “Which Meme User are you?” test, I’d be right out there to discover I was the Casual Meme Inflicter (You tend to only do memes for your own amusement, but you can’t resist showing off your results, either. Avoid the Skeptic Quizzilla User; consider Evangelical Personality Questioner)…
Hm. That was the end of the third can of Mountain Dew. Did I mention that I start Proper Work on Friday? Come back, sleeping patterns, all is forgiven!
I really hope this doesn’t break everything. Particular apologies to LJ people, who may well get some really ugly cross-posted stuff. And to RSS people, who’ve had no idea why I kept putting out the ‘Breakfast, breakfast, Sun, Dock, Trog’ messages while I was looking for the crossposter to notice I’d installed it. |
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